This is the kind of recording that every audio geek dreams of, one of those ultra-rare instances when something completely hilarious and perfect is happening, and you just so happen to have a tape recorder running. Something like this could never be written or staged. This recording, made completely by accident while trying to record something else, sums up the mentality of the neighborhood that I grew up in so exquisitely that nothing I could produce artificially could ever come close. Basically, what happened was this. Back when I was in high school, a friend of mine called me up one afternoon and told me to turn on the local talk radio station. There was a sports call-in show on, and he told me that he was going to prank call the line and do something funny on-air. In order to capture this beautiful moment in conceptual art history, I switched on my tape recorder and told him to go for it. Anyway, as it turned out, I never managed to record his call, because he was on hold for about two hours and I ran out of tape well before that. However, I did manage to record a legitimate call made by an actual fan of the show, who proved to be such a moronic redneck that the moronic rednecks who hosted the show were making fun of him for being such a moronic redneck. Also, fun fact: although I did not actually get to record it, my friend did end up finally getting on the air. He waited for about two hours, bluffed his way past two different call screeners, made a fart noise on the air, and hung up the phone. One of the show's hosts was heard to remark: "Wow. He actually waited two hours just to do that."